Sunday, January 23, 2005

Real Fruit Jelly Bobs Her Hair

Real Fruit Jelly wants to get a hair cut -- a dramatic, totally different kind of hair cut. She wants it really short like Annie Lennox, the female singer with the close cropped hair formerly one half of the Eurythmics. Like Lennox, RFJ wants that barely there hair look -- short, easy to take care of and stunning. Interestingly, Lennox's latest album is called "Bare."

Needless to say, a hair cut like this is a big decision. A real big one. And RFJ isn't one for making impulsive physical changes. She's only dyed her hair once and that was just to hide a couple of gray hairs. She's worn her thick, wavy hair long for a long time -- it falls just below her shoulders. When she's working or taking care of her daughter, she pulls it back in a pony tail with a scrunchie or small barettes.

But when she dresses up to attend a birthday party or a Bruce Springsteen concert -- she usually has it blown out at the local Aveeda Salon. That makes her look quite elegant, even glamorous with shades of Sandra Bullock.

Just the other day, RFJ told Smartmom that she'd been thinking about the Annie Lennox cut for a long time. Months ago she'd floated the idea past a good friend and didn't quite get the reaction she wanted. Her friend wondered if RFJ's face was symetrical enough for such a "severe" look. She studied the photo of Annie Lennox that RFJ had and delineated the differences between RFJ and Lennox's face.

RFJ was disappointed, even hurt that her friend didn't support her desire. She found herself retreating from the idea, feeling that it wasn't meant to be.

Smartmom had a very different reaction. As she listened to RFJ's story, she found herself hoping that RFJ would just do it. Who doesn't fantasize about hair experimentation? It's partly a make-over fantasy. But it's also a "make me who I really am" fantasy. It's the longing to truly bring out the essence of you.

In so many ways, Real Fruit Jelly is on her own journey right now; a journey of discovery. She's decided to take a "time out" from her chosen career to explore some other possibilities. She's thinking about decorating cakes, studying literature and learning to speak French. It's a exciting time -- full of exploration. She's really taking the time to figure out what she wants to do with her life and who she wants to be.

And that's where Annie Lennox comes in. RFJ has taken the bold step of imagining herself in a brand new way. She wants to clip those wavy locks and show her face to the world. Fearlessly. It's as if she's saying: this is who I am and I'm not hiding anymore.

Smartmom wonders whether RFJ will decide to do it. It is not, by any means, something she has to do. It's not like she has to prove that she's brave or anything - everyone knows that. Truly, it's perfectly fine to just toy with the idea.

And that's the point: to explore possibilities freely. That's where RFJ is at right now: thinking about a new hair cut, a new career, a new way of looking at herself and the world. Sweet dreams are made of this...


At 8:00 AM, Blogger red eft said...

RFJ, I am in the Just Do It camp. I've had very long hair and cut it to an inch, on several occasions. They do seem to coincide with fresh life phases, for example, I did it each time a child was born. It feels great not to have hair hanging around. I also love long hair, so I usually grow it back. But it's so easy and wonderful, and no static electricity. Your face is open to the world and the world is open to you...go for it!

At 5:19 PM, Blogger mamainwaiting said...

I have been wearing my hair shorter for the last year or so. The cut has been liberating in the sense that I allowed my face to stand out a little bit more than I had in the past. For the first time, I began to accept my face; my large nose and imperfect profile - and enjoyed who I was. The last haircut I received was my favorite. Many people complimented me on it. It was only when my mother told me "it's too short, but it will grow in soon enough ", that I began to question my choice. I suddenly found myself feeling a little bit foolish to think that I could carry off shorter hair and let my face hang out, so to speak. Her comment really stung me until I realized that It was my perogative to care what she had to say. Hey, it was ok if she didn't like my hairstyle because I liked it. And, I had shown a certain type of courage to make a change in how I looked.

So in saying all this, I am eager to see RFJ's new "Look" and wonder if she is planning to dye it platinum blond as well.


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